I made a big mistake tonight. And its entirely my fault.
Jeff and I got into an arguement..because I'm completely stressed, emotional and tired.
I feel like a big pile of steaming poop about it too :(
I'm still working on how to mask my stress when he and I get to talk, or even in general...but when the pills start piling up on the desk, and school turns my life into chaos, and the fact that I just started working again begins to stress me out...I haven't quite determined how to deal with it. You would think that I should be good at this by now, since I've spent nearly this entire year alone..but it is still hard. It doesn't get easier.
When the days are sucky, sometimes all I need is a big hug from the one person who can make it all better...but it just so happens, that person is Jeff. and I will be waiting for that hug for a while.
I don't mean to have a downer post like this, I had all kinds of good posts planned...but I'm just really feeling crappy tonight. I hate that he and I got in a fight, I hate that it happened while the baby was screaming, which added to the tension, I hate that I'm as stressed out as I am..
I know that one of the reasons I'm as stressed as I am, is because school literally consumes my life this week with training I have to accomplish the next two days before I can do clinicals at the University hospital here...pointless computer training, which takes up two whole days of my life that i NEED to spend doing more important things.. UGH
All I want is a big bowl of ice cream to make me feel better, but i'm trying to lose the baby weight (plus extra)..and that isn't going well either...which stresses me out more. UGH
Well, I should just call it a night since I have to have Sqworms to the sitter by 7:30 am...means I won't be getting much sleep tonight :(...
I promise I'll have more upbeat posts for the rest of the week...